SPOILER ALERT (also trigger warning because sexual assault is mentioned and so is a character’s use of slurs. also this movie is not suited for young kids so if you are young. SKEDADDLE)
so i watched this movie the other day. and i didn’t know how to feel at first. it was weird as heck, but pretty good. i was very confused on what was happening, but after i got that it was pretty interesting. basically daniel radcliffe’s girlfriend died and everyone thinks he did it, he didn’t, and he grows horns and people tell him their darkest secrets. fun, right? so he decides to try basically everyone was in love with her. (okay it’s like two people but still) and he finds out that one of his friends growing up is gay. specifically the one who called everyone the f slur. i called it when i was watching it. i just knew.
well anyway ig’s, that’s daniel radcliffe, lawyer is his best friend, lee. lee is the Nice Guy™️. you know the guy who talks about how his friend who’s a girl is nice to him and looks at him sometimes and “obviously she’s in love with me and is going to break up with her boyfriend of YEARS for me” and then when she rejects him he tries to rape her and then bashes her head with a rock and kills her. and then tried to frame ig’s brother, terry, for the murder.
terry by the way was the other person in love with merrin, ig’s girlfriend, (im so bad at giving you everyone‘s names im sorry) now he never tried to make a move or anything so kudos to him. when merrin broke up with ig he gave her a ride and then she got out of the car and when through the woods in the rain, so terry waited for her and fell asleep and then lee murdered her and planted the rock in terry’s hand. terry freaks out and drops it in a lake and never speaks of it. UNTIL ig and his persuasive horns make him tell. eventually ig has a confrontation with lee and turns into some weird goat-like satan and kills lee and then turns into like harden lava in terry’s arms. (i don’t remember what that’s called im sorry) the end.
okay so i’m going to talk about my favorite character now. i haven’t mentioned her because she wasn’t that big of a plot point, but i have a problem with liking side character so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. okay so her name is glenna and she was friends with ig, terry, lee, and eric (the guy who turned out to be gay after using the slurs) when they were growing up. she was always in love with ig, but he never felt the same. she used to do things like give terry and eric hand jobs because “she thinks that’s the only way guys will like her. but they just think she’s trash” thanks lee. and she just wants to leave but won’t because of ig, which he tells her to “put this shithole town in your rear view mirror and do something good for yourself” i just feel for her you know?
she’s also one of the few people in town who don’t think ig killed merrin so points for that. she really intrigues me and, for some unknown reason, i think she would’ve been good with terry if it worked out. they kinda have similar personalities in a way. but alas they didn’t. which brings me to my next point.
i really has this whole idea about writing something for it, but i was like “nah that’s too weird and unrealistic” and then i realized. the whole premise of this movie is unrealistic. i mean dude grows horns and people tell him things and then forget they told him? i could do whatever the heck i want and no one could say a word. so i’m going to write a fanfiction and post it on archiveofourown if any of you want to read it. my account is the same as on here. allfortheaesthetic. no clue when this fanfic is going to come out so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ we’ll see.
in the mean time check out Horns on netflix and have a great time.